Monday, March 18, 2013

Workin On YO Fitness!

The Transporter movies are absolutely terrible. Just saying. 
So yesterday I talked about finding and living your truth. Did you figure out your words? 
Today I am going to talk about step 4 of Brendon Burchard's High Performance Academy. I was going to vlog this one too but the second I got through the door the pantalones and the bra came off and now I am in my comfy sweats....maybe tomorrow....but highly unlikely.
So step 4 is Physiology (another reason I didn't vlog this: It would have taken me about 10 minutes to try to say that...I'm a girl of simple words....)
So the question you say to ask yourself everyday is really extremely simple: Am I rested and hydrated? 
How many of you college kids pulled an all-nighter on an essay or to study and found the results not as good as you hoped it to be. As I have gotten older I have realized how important sleep is. If I don't get sleep. my immune system will crash, I can't focus and I find my self performing less than stellar work. Millionaires and successful people know this. You don't see them partying til wee hours of the morning. They know they need to be at the top of their A game everyday and they can't unless they are healthy, which means well-rested.
I can not tell you enough how frustrated I was when every morning I was fatigued and exhausted and had no energy to achieve my goals. 
We could spend months and years talking about how to improve your health. But since I am not a doctor and since this is not a fitness blog ( that would ever happen..7/10 posts on this blog talks about my consumption of beer and nutella...) I am going to talk about 1.) the two simple, no-brainer ways you can improve your health and 2.) what I am doing to improve my health.
Get plenty of sleep and drink plenty of water. BOOM. That's it. Simple, right?! First of all you need between 7-9 hours of sleep. Every. night. Not 7-9 during the week and then 3-4 hours on the weekend. Every night. And it is best to try and sleep on the same schedule. I kiiiiinda suck at this. On nights when I have a Slumber Party I get home anywhere between 9-11. And I stay up to organize my stock, my "office" (aka my closet...), put in any backorders etc etc. So I end up going to bed between 11pm and 1 am. At nights I don't have a bed between 8pm and 10pm. Naughty. 
I have started drinking between 80 and 100 ounces of water a day. Last winter my kidneys almost went into failure twice and got horrible infections. I was out of commission for a long time. Now if I don't have water for about 3 hours I will actually get extremely nauseous. Now the whole "how much water should I drink a day?" think has had SO many different answers and again, I'm not a doctor (nor do I want to be, like 10 years of thanks!) but I asked my doctor and we discussed a healthy amount between how much I weigh and my health history. But since guzzling down water I have noticed a HUGE difference. My skin is clearer, my hair healthier, I have more energy and I don't crave junk food as much.
Other things that I have started doing is trying to figure out ways to eat healthier: I am consuming more fruits and veggies. I'm trying to opt for more non-processed foods (except beer and nutella...let's not jump the gun here folks). I educated myself about ingredient lists and nutrition labels. I carry a water bottle EVERYWHERE. I am getting more into essential oils and natural remedies. 
So that's it for this step....simple yeah? What are YOU doing to improve your physiology (how in the hell do you say that?!), or how you do intend to?
I am going to give away one of Brendon Burchard's book of The Charge. Here's how you can win:
Comment on your goals for each step, or how you are accomplishing this step = 1 entry
Share on Facebook and comment here that you shared it = 1 entry
Share it on Twitter and comment here that you shared it (make sure to include @itsme_arielleb in the tweet) = 1 entry
Share it on Pinterest and comment here that you shared it = 1 entry.
I will pick a random winner on March 25th. Make sure you do this for the next 2 posts after this one. GOOD LUCK!!!!

Sunday, March 17, 2013

What's Your Word?

Last night I talked about being more present everyday. Today I was going to try Vlogging (video blogging) but um...I had an allergic reaction to something any my eyelids are swollen and I have hivey welts all over. So that will not be happening. 
Today I am going to talk about the 3rd step that High Performance people use everyday. It is Psychology. 
Great people know how to use every aspect of their minds and know how other people use their minds as well. Millionaires, intellectuals, and leaders also have a great sense of direction. They know what they are doing, how they need to do it and how to achieve it. They don't just show up to work and say, "I'll just do whatever today, meh, whatever happens, happens." They have a plan. And they follow it. The question you need to be asking yourself every day is:
Am I living my truth?
Your truth associates with your identity. It's about knowing who you are. So that means you have know what your truth is! How do you figure out what your truth is? 
Pick 3 words. 3 separate words that define who you are as a person. Just 3. What words define who you are or who you want to be? My words are: PRESENT, OPTIMISTIC, LOVING.
I say these words to myself throughout the day. I have it written on my mirror in my room, my rearview mirror in my car (small and on the side so it's not distracting...). I have them written in my planner on the top of every page and I have it written as a banner on my phone. 
Now pick 3 more words. 3 words that define how you interact with other people. When people talk to you or spend time with you, how do you want them to feel when you are with them? How would you want them to describe you if you walked away? My words are: LOYAL, INSPIRING, CARING. These words are with my other 3 words in the same places. Before I speak or engage with another person, I repeat these words in my head. And repeating them will make me act this way towards that person. 
By asking yourself if you are living your truth, you are asking yourself if you are those words that you picked. I have to ask myself, "Am I being present, am I being optimistic, am I being Loving?" If the answer is no to any of those three, I need to step back and figure out how to get back on track, because if you're not being your words, you are not living your truth.
When Brendon Burchard talked about this it reminded me of the book, Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. While Elizabeth is in Italy, she is asked what her word is. She says her word is "writer" because that's what she does. A friend of her says, "That is what you do, but it's not who you are." I love that. I think people define themselves too often by how much money is in the bank or how much success they have in their work. That's a part of your life, but that doesn't make up who you are. Liz goes in search for her word throughout her journey and in the end finds it. I had to think long and hard about what my words are. It's kind of morbid how I figured it out but I imagined my funeral (yeah...morbid I know.) and what I would want people to say about me. I would want them to say, "Arielle was always present." "Arielle made the best out of every situation, she was so optimistic." "Arielle was a very loving woman." 
When I interact with others I ask myself, "In this relationship, am I being loyal? Am I uplifting this person and inspiring them? And am I showing them that I care about them and their feelings?" 
Once you have these words, you have a road map! You aren't just wandering about aimlessly, you have direction and you know where to go. 
These words, once repeated on a daily basis, will start to change your thoughts which in turn will change your behaviors. You need to describe the version of your higher self. And strive everyday to live up to those standards. 
 I am going to give away one of Brendon Burchard's book of The Charge. Here's how you can win:
Comment on what your 6 words are = 1 entry
Share on Facebook and comment here that you shared it = 1 entry
Share it on Twitter and comment here that you shared it (make sure to include @itsme_arielleb in the tweet) = 1 entry
Share it on Pinterest and comment here that you shared it = 1 entry.
I will pick a random winner on March 25th. Make sure you do this for the next 5 posts after this one. GOOD LUCK!!!!
For more information about The Charge by Brendon Burchard and his other books visit:
For information about Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert and her other works visit:

Saturday, March 16, 2013

Be Present and Win Stuff YAAAAY!

So for those of you who don't know, I'm back to doing Slumber Parties (for a while now but...whatevs). Anywho, so convention is in Vegas on Thursday (EEEEEK SO EXCITED!) and to earn a little extra dough I thought I'd throw a party at my place. I  put together a cute gift basket, scrubbed the apartment for like 6 hours, yada yada yada. I had like 20 girls RSVP....3 showed up. Kill. Me. Now. It ended up working out fine and I really enjoyed it and was SO happy to see the girls who came. But I was also kiiiiiiinda pissed. I had friends who knew about the party like a month ago and totally flaked and it was just really annoying. 
Afterwards I get on the phone and call my girl Kirshna, who has just moved to Kansas and was really bummed they couldn't wait another week so she can make it. 
"Our house has a storm cellar. I want to leave."
"You could totally get a little black dog and dress up like Dorthy!"
"No. That would be stupid. How'd your party go? I'm really mad I missed it."
"People flaked. 3 people showed up and I'm really glad they did and it means SO much to me but yeah...still a little pissed. Now I'm all discouraged and I don't know if I can be successful...."
"Baby girl, the actions of other people do not define your success, once you allow it to, you no longer want to be successful. YOU make your success."
"Ar, are you there?"
"That was deep. Holy shit, that wasn't even like Oprah or Dr. Phil deep, that was Dali Lama deep."
"Thanks...I try."
"That really helped me, a lot. Thank you!!"
After whining about how much we missed each other we hung up and I logged on to Facebook. All of a sudden a Facebook page popped up, I must have accidentally clicked on it. It was a page for Brendon Burchard. He was some motivational speaker. He wrote a book called The Charge. I have no idea what possessed me but I said to myself, "I want that book.' And found myself buying it on Amazon....I haven't done that in forever. Everytime I want to buy something I don't NEED I mull it over for days and days and day. 70% of the time I don't buy it. The other 30% I do but then I spend a week in guilt. Pure, nasty, "Irish-Catholic-grandmother-found-out-you-were-having-a-baby-out-of-wedlock-and-the-father's-a-Baptist" guilt. I bought 2 dresses that I NEED FOR WORK and it cost $2 not $20 but $2 and I bit my nails in remorse the whole way home. This was $16.18 and I felt no guilt. None. I'm  still waiting for it's not there. So on this guys website it said "email your receipt for a free gift." Sweet, I like gifts, I email him my receipt and I get an email. Something about a High Performance Academy blah blah blah with videos and shit. Whatevs I'll watch it. 
33 minutes later...a totally new girl is sitting here. So what did this guy say? Well it's alot of info. But he basically says at the end of the video that our mission is to share it so I will share it bit by bit over this next few days. 
So there are basically 6 steps that all High Performing people use. These people are people who build empires, make millions and live totally happy and enlightened lives. I am going to share the 2nd step with you right now. 
"Uh...Arielle, I know math isn't your strongest suit but...where's 1...the number that comes before 2?" Shut up I'm not that dumb. Basically Number 1 is the one you NEED to come back to every day. It is your foundation. So we are doing last. Why? Because Brendon Burchard said to, and he makes the rules. 
The number 2 step that all High Performance people do is "Being Present."
This pretty much smacked me in my face. I am NEVER present. I can't do anything without multi-tasking. Even when I am relaxing I am doing 2 or 3 things at once. 
You need to ENGAGE. Be in the moment. Be in the moment at work. Be in the moment at home. Be in the moment when buying produce. Be in the moment when filling up the gas tank. Stop thinking about everything else you have to do or didn't do or should do and just be in the now. When I am with Brody at home, I need to be engaged towards Brody (I'd also like to BE engaged TO Brody but different story different time...). I need to focus on him, what he saying at the moment. Be EXCITED to be present with him. The question you need to ask yourself every day is: "What level am I in this moment, in terms of emotional and physical vibrancy and presence?" I love the wording of "in terms of emotional and physical vibrancy." Think about it: when you first meet someone you REALLY like, you hang on to every word, you are SO excited and enthusiastic to listen to what they have to say. It shows through your physical body language and your emotions. After awhile it's just not a big deal anymore. Yeah, you care what they have to say but that enthusiasm may not be there. The first little while, when they walk through the door you got giddy and excited, you stopped what you were doing and was just present with them. Now, you say hi and how was their day but you probably don't stop what you are doing. You need to be like how you were the first few weeks EVERYDAY with EVERYTHING. Be excited. Be enthusiastic. With EVERYBODY. Level 1 is you are pretty much everywhere else mentally but in the present. Level 10 is you could not be more present. You are enthusiastic about the present. You are excited about the present. Before you sell, speak, do anything, you need to evaluate your level. If you aren't a level 8,9 or need to get there. Put down what you are doing and engage. 
My favorite peice of advice about being more engaged to your spouse is called "The 6 Second Kiss." When you or your partner walk in through the door stop everything and kiss them for 6 straight seconds. Why 6 seconds? Why not 5?
1.)It can restore emotional connections with your partner.
2.)It communicate your love in a tangible way.
3.)In 6 seconds your body will release the hormone Oxytocin that makes you feel bliss and a close connection to your partner.
4.) Children who see affection from their parents will most likely make a relationship with the same affection a goal, which in turn will create great relationships later on.
5.) Um....kissing is fun. Why not 6 seconds? Hell do it for 3 minutes! Do a full on french makeout! 
The 6 Second Kiss is a great way to start focusing on the present. My goal is to stop trying to multi task so much. Yeah it's great but it's not being present. I am going to stop allowing Facebook and the computer be the distraction, especially with Brody, when he comes home this week I am going to turn off the computer give him a 6 second kiss (or longer...whatevs...) and be fully engaged and present with him. 
How are you going to be more present? 
I am going to give away one of Brendon Burchard's book of The Charge. Here's how you can win:
Comment on your goals for each step, or how you are accomplishing this step = 1 entry
Share on Facebook and comment here that you shared it = 1 entry
Share it on Twitter and comment here that you shared it (make sure to include @itsme_arielleb in the tweet) = 1 entry
Share it on Pinterest and comment here that you shared it = 1 entry.
I will pick a random winner on March 25th. Make sure you do this for the next 5 posts after this one. GOOD LUCK!!!!
For more information about The Charge by Brendon Burchard and his other books visit:
Other Sources: "Bite-Size Tip: To Restore and Emotional Connection with a '6 Second Kiss'."

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Baking and Budweiser!

8 pm: "Babe I am EXHAUSTED, I'm going to bed." I say to Brody.
"Yeah me too."
8:15: Bedtime....
9:18: "I want a doughnut." I say to no one in particular.
"Krispy Kremes Closes at 10 wanna go?" 
"We've been there like 3 times this week already....and it's only Tuesday...I want cookies...we don't have cookies."
"Make some."
9:22: Alrighty Pinterest don't let a girl down.
9:25: I swear on my cat's life that I pinned a peanut butter cookie recipe....
9:26: Sorry Taffy....
9:28: Found cookie recipe, this is just peanut butter, that's dumb, let's add NUTELLA!!
9:30: We don't have a 3/4 measuring cup....I'M DOOMED!
9:31: Ask a sleeping tired Brody what to do.
9:32: resume cooking. 
9:33: EFF YOU BROWN SUGAR! GET IN MY MEASURING CUP! *Breaks handle off of measuring cup* We won't say anything to Brody.
9:34: PISH POSH! We don't need to measure anything we'll just eyeball it!
9:40: Discover baking soda is a giant solid block, we'll just break off a peice that we think is 3/4 of a teaspoon....
9:41: That looks more like 3/4 of a table spoon...where's my WHISK?!
9:42: It is in the sink with the hamburger helper dinner we had tonight....I can wash it off.
9:43: Notice soap bubbles while
9:44: A pinch of salt....this damn salt shaker is SO annoying it never- top of salt shaker comes off and allllllllllll of the salt goes into the bowl.
9:44-9:55: try to pick out as much salt out of cookie mixture as possible....
9:55: Eh, a pinch of salt, a handful of salt, what's the difference.
9:56: *sing to tune of Spiderman song* Cookie Balls, cookie balls, get a load of my cookie balls, are they good? I don't know, but they're made with salt and soap...LOOK OUT here comes cookie balls!
9:57: Cookies are in the oven....
9:58: Oh yeah...turn on the oven...
9:59: OH LOOK! Frosting...let's eat some!
10:00-10:12: Log into Facebook:
Start Facebook stalking old classmates:
"Jesus...she's fertile! She's having ANOTHER kid!!?"
"Don't care..don't care...ew....they got MARRIED?!" 
"Honey someone needs to tell you that your shorts should be longer than your vagina...."
"OMYGOD! This girl is SO annoying! Who is that?....oh shit...that's me..."
Google, Facebook Addiction signs....
Timer for oven goes off.
Cookie soup....
Why are they this color?
How many Budwiesers did I have?
4?! 4?! I had 4 beers in an hour?!!!! 
I should blog about this....
I don't even want cookies anymore....
Oh hey! Frosting!

Thursday, March 7, 2013


If anyone of you out there, are one of those people who can just turn off your mind when you go to bed. Go away. You are not wanted here.
Since I was like 5 I remember just laying there, thinking about everything and anything. 
People would tell me to write down my thoughts, or even meditate to clear my mind.
But writing doesn't help. Just because the thought trickled down from my brain and out my fingers doesn't mean it has been erased from my mind. 
Meditating helped, I would feel really calm, and really centered. And then 10 minutes later I was back to thinking.
Grocery lists, to do lists. How we are going to pay to do and buy the things on these lists. Bills. Bill Cosby. When are we going to get married? Are we going to be one of those couples that date for like 10 years and she finally just snaps mentally and runs off to the wilderness of Canada and becomes a lumberjack? I should get a plaid shirt one day. When are we going to have babies? What if one of our babies have a life-long disability? Where do people buy wheelchairs? I'm going to be old one day. Death. Dying. Dyeing my hair. Remember when I dyed my hair blonde, dark brown and purple? That was awesome. I want my nose ring back. Ring. When are we getting married? I need to organize the closet again. What should I make for dinner tomorrow? I hope my paycheck is enough for everything. You know what would be NYSYNC reunion....
And then I start humming, "Tearing up My Heart" until I notice Brody is clearly agitated. 
And tonight on top of everything else, I found out my cat has hemorrhoids. Hemorrhoids. She has freakin hemorrhoids. I found this out because...long story. Anyways I called the vet ER and talked to a vet tech who said it's actually probably the beginning of hemorrhoids and just to start making sure she drinks lots of water and starts moving around more. But now I lay awake thinking about what food to put her on, we need to get her shots done soon, how would we pay for a vet bill. I worry and worry and worry. 
I need to stop worrying. Maybe I'll lie awake for the rest of the night trying to figure out a way to stop worrying.  

Monday, March 4, 2013

Some Really Bad Pictures Of Me and Why It Needs To Change.

If you read my post about retiring my dumbbells as a shoe rack and actually start using them (you can read about it here: ), you know I am starting a new fitness journey.
Before you say it, let me just say if I got a dime for every time someone said "OMG You're SOOOO skinny you don't need to workout!!" I wouldn't have to work anymore. 
So before I SHOW you why I need to do this, let me tell you:
When I was 19 I found out I had Scoliosis. I went in to do a chest x-ray for my lungs and ended up getting a 45 minute lecture about my spine. It is shaped like a "S". Well not like exactly a "S" but close enough. I like to say that my spine is the shape of a crazy straw. It makes it more lovable, yeah? It explained a lot about my shoulder pain and my hip pain...and my back pain. And why my hips and my shoulders are crooked. My doctor and physical therapist explained it in more detail. Because of the way my spine is shaped my muscles aren't in the best shape. On one side my muscles are loosey goosey, the other side they are extremely tight. Both results in horrible knots (ask Brody how many times a week he has to work a knot out). Also because of my spine my hips are crooked, which results in painfully tight hip flexors. 
For me, becoming fit doesn't mean 6 pack abs or toned thighs (although it would be a bonus...), it means living life without daily pain. After 5 minutes of walking my hips hurt. My shoulders are in constant pain, 24 hours a day. My back feels like it should belong to a 70 year old, I struggle lifting things over 15 lbs. 
When I was taking dance fitness classes, I was stretching up to 4 hours a day. I was doing weight lifting, yoga and being stretched over the physical limit by instructors. Although it was difficult, my body never felt better. 
It has been less than 7 months since I left those classes. I have not done any physical activity. And I have lost all flexibility. And all my muscle. Which I desperately need because it is really annoying needing other people carry things for me, and that I get out of breath carrying a load of towels to the washing machine. I took "before" pictures so I can document my progress. Which I will take pictures every 2 weeks. I apologize for the following pictures...Brody took them...(thanks honey! ahem...)

This is my arm...I am flexing as hard as I can...I's sad....

"Arielle, why did you put a picture of you just sitting?" One, I apologize for my face, Brody was making me laugh....Two, I am not just sitting, this is as far as my legs will extend. And this is really painful for me too. After sitting here for 10 seconds, it was really difficult for me to get up and my hips and legs are really sore.

To many people, this is just bending over. This is as far as I can bend down before I have to bend my knees. Again, after 10 seconds of this it was hard to straighten out and my lower back hurt. Oh and I can't straighten out my hunches over like that naturally, another thing I need to work on.

I promise my cooch is safely tucked in there.....I checked like 12 times before taking the picture. This is how far I can extend my legs in a "butterfly" stretch. After about 20 seconds of this, my knees cracked as I tried to stand up and my legs gave out. 

I second-guessed whether I should post these. I am embarrassed. I am 23 years old and I look like I have the body of a 70 year old. But I made a promise to myself that I would be honest with myself with this blog, so there it is. For the whole world to see. Tomorrow I start my journey. A journey that hopefully will lead me to a life without pain. I can walk for a long period of time and my hips won't hurt. I can lift my kids one day and my back won't hurt. I can play on the floor with them and rough-house. I can feel good about myself. Not embarrassed. I probably won't write every day about my experience (because I have other shit to do and other stories to tell...) but I will AT LEAST every 2 weeks.


Sunday, March 3, 2013

Sticks And Stones

There is a picture that has shown up a lot on my newsfeed on  Facebook  this morning. It is a picture of celebrity Kim Kardashian in a black and white dress next to an Orca with the text "Who Wore It Best". It is obviously an unflattering picture of her. Had it been a more "lovable" star like Julia Roberts or Jennifer Lawrence would people stand up and say.."That's wrong"? If it was YOUR daughter, YOUR sister, YOUR friend, wouldn't you be infuriated? Wouldn't there be comments dripping from your Facebook filled with anger and echo the words, "Take it down." And, "That's horrible."? But because it is a person that we have seen only snippets of her life and we feel that it is enough to make a judgement from, it's ok? "She had a sex tape she's a whore." "She got married for 72 days, she's an attention-whore." A person is not allowed mistakes in her life? Even when she has a spotlight and a camera in front of her?  And even then, do we know the whole truth about her, really?  Out of everyone who had put up that picture, who has spent more than a day with her? Who has gotten to know, not only just her surface, but her soul?
It is no wonder that 1 in 200 women suffer from Anorexia, and 3 in 100 suffer from Bulimia. How may young girls saw that picture and now have a fear in their sub-conscious that they too will have a picture slapped on social media. 
The message of this picture has expanded from this one person. It has leaped off our computer screens and cell phones and has echoed off the walls off schools. It has been implanted into the ears of those too young to understand it will get better. In June 2012 The New York Daily News put out a terrifying article. With data collected over the last three years, it has been found that 1 in 6 high school students seriously considered suicide. 1 in 12 attempted it. And it's not only the school yard bullies they have to worry about now. It's the bullies that reside in their computer, it's the bullies that reside in magazine covers and the entertainment channel. It's the whispers that speak louder than screams. The whispers of, "You're too fat." "You're too stupid." "You're ugly." And the thing is, that these whispers don't just go in one ear and out the other. No, they take residence in their brains and it grows, and it grows so big that it now lives in their heart. And these horrible whispers grow more and more until it has nowhere to go but to settle in the soul. And once it gets there, no eviction notice can be served. It stays. And for some kids, they'd rather destroy their soul then try to destroy the words themselves. Whether it be numbing the pain with a substance, or permanently numbing the pain with a rope or a gun.
Many of you at this point is saying "it's just a picture, it was just for fun." How many times have you heard that from a bully? How many of you have had your child come running home crying and when you go to investigate, the bully has looked you in the eye and said, "it was just for fun."? And when has it been ok to laugh at the expense of others? I am guilty of this too. Why don't we find an unflattering picture of you and dissect your life? Let's put this picture next to a Rhino, or a Hippo, or a Pig and allow the internet to laugh and point? Let's see how you feel.
I am in no way saying that the people who posted this are bad horrible people. Just like most school yard bullies, we just don't know better. We have become so desensitized, that we forget. We say to our children, "sticks and stones may break your bones but words can never hurt you."
The thing is, a broken leg and a broken arm is fixed over time. Words sometimes are never healed.

South Carolina Department of Mental Health, Eating Disorder Statistics,
New York Daily News, Meghan Neal, 1 in 12 Teens Have Attempted Suicide,

Saturday, March 2, 2013

A Really Mushy Note For The Love Of My Life...Seriously It's Mushy...

WARNING: This post is super mushy. Like really. Like I am nauseous just typing have been warned....

So I am sitting in the dark in our apartment just thinking. Thinking about how bad I want some Mac N Cheese but I am too lazy to get up and get some. And how lucky I am. 
When I was a little little girl, my heart was broken into a million little pieces by someone that I thought would never break it. Because they weren't supposed to. While other little girls were planning out their fairytales and what their husband would look like and what they'd name their 6 kids, I figured out what college I would go to and what profession I would be. When the other kids played house they had a mommy and a daddy, I was fine just being the mommy and not having a daddy. I had made a promise to myself. No one would ever break my heart the way it was broken. I loved watching all those Disney princesses find their prince and I knew that it could be real, but it wouldn't happen to me. And that was fine.
Before you there were A LOT of first dates, maybe a second and on rare occasion a third. But I never felt myself get swept off my feet. I never found someone that I would go to the ends of the world with. So I immersed myself in my work. 
One day a very wise person said to me, "A career is nice, but at the end of the day you can't fall asleep with a career...unless you are a prostitute...and I don't think you can even sleep on the job even then..." And they had a point....a prostitute would probably get in trouble with their pimp for falling asleep on the job.
So after that advice, I did not become a prostitute. But I went on more dates. More. Horrible. Dates. Horrible. Horrible. Dates. "It probably wasn't that bad." You say. Um I had a guy...on our first date...tell me he liked having sex with girls on their period because he felt like he was killing a small animal. PS: If you tip your waiter enough money they will cause a distraction while you sneak out...also always drive to the first 3 dates, that way you always have a get a way...why am I telling you this?
ANYWHO. One night I met this guy on my friend's patio. I heard his laugh before I saw him and for the first time in my heart melted, like butta. I knew he was really out of my league but a girl can dream right?
I went out with a different guy a few nights later, it was going SO bad that I told him I was sick and left. I remember calling a girlfriend in tears.
"I am such an idiot. I'm in a dress and wearing heels and it took me like 2 hours to get ready for some asshole. I am SO done with dating! I just want to find someone who won't make stabbing myself in the eyeball with a fork sound more appealing!"
"Baby, you know what you need to do? Stop dancing with BOYS. Just dance with God for a few songs. He will let the perfect man to cut in at the perfect time."
After we hung up I decided to go hang out with some friends, I already shimmied my way into a dress I might as well wear it for more than an hour. And I spotted the "out of my league" guy across the bar. And in my head I said a little prayer.
"Please God, let that be the one that cuts in."
After a few weeks of flirting and super awkwardness...I knew. This guy was the one I wanted to be with. 
I wish I could grab the 5 year old me and look at her in the eye and say, "He IS out there and you WILL find him and baby girl, he will do more than fix that broken heart. He will make it better, he will make it love better.You ARE worth someone's love. You DO deserve a fairy tale. Please do yourself a favor. Don't put up that wall. Don't make it so hard for someone to get to know you. There are people in this world that won't hurt you."
For the first time I wasn't scared. I wasn't going to look for the nearest exit and book it. And for the first time, I was making plans. 
I never dreamed about a wedding til I met you. I never thought about having babies until I met you. And now I sit in OUR home that WE made and think that I am the luckiest girl in the world.
You make fun of how I drag my feet when I walk. And how it takes me 18 bites to eat a french fry instead of three or four. You piss me off when you try to pop my toes. I hate that I always have to ask you to help me find my phone or my driver's license or my debit card. But I know you'll always find it. Which makes me mad too. It also pisses me off that I can never stay mad at you because you make me laugh...but I love it too. I love our messy apartment that still has some Christmas decorations in it, I love how we manage to sleep in a full size bed without wanting to kill each other. 
You work harder than anyone I know. It breaks my heart sometimes. I hate seeing the burns and the bruises and the callouses. But I love when the going gets tough we have each other, and one of us will always take the other persons hand and say, "hey, it won't be like this forever, we'll get there." 
I can't imagine sharing my life with anybody else. I want to be 70 years old yelling at you for trying to pop my damn toes and falling asleep during every movie we watch. You make me better. You make me stronger. I honestly don't know where I would be today, if I didn't have you. Really, I don't know, because I can't afford this apartment by myself....
We are just starting out. A little over a year and a half. We have so much growing to do. We have so many hard times and good times ahead of us. Our relationship will be tested and we will have to put in work. But it will be so worth it. I can't wait to see what is in store for us. I love you so much honey. 

Friday, March 1, 2013

The Time Has Come To Stop Using My Dumbells As A Shoe Rack....

The time has come. It's time to slap denial in the da face. I have been avoiding it. But I can't any longer. 
I have to get my flabby ass into shape. Now before you say "you weigh like 5 pounds...." Yes I am a skinny freak...but there is no muscle. Like at all. When Brody gets home there's usually between 6 to 12 jars on the counter that have to be opened. It's sad. 
He loved the idea of getting me back to my dance classes. I mean, this summer I had made SO much progress, I was about 80% into my splits and I had better abs then Jessica Alba in "Honey". Chya. By the time I had to cancel my membership I could hold myself on a pole just using my thighs. And even though they were covered in bruises and were constantly sore, I loved every second of it. 
Since I can't buy my membership just yet, I thought I would figure out some workout regimen to do at home so by the time I start I am somewhat in shape. Sooooooo here's the schedule so far: 

Mondays: Yoga (mostly for flexibility, opening up my hip flexors which are PAINFULLY tight, also to help me work on getting my splits back.)

Wednesdays: Arms (I have NO idea how to go about this so ANY help is appreciated.)

Fridays: Yoga again.

Saturdays: Arms

Sundays: Yoga

So I give myself Tuesday and Thursday off. Mostly because of work. If anyone has any suggestions about working out let me know. We have a gym at our apartment complex but let's get And I don't work out for more than an hour so all yall crazy people who work out 4 hours a day...get a life. 
SIGH! I guess I will document my progress....we'll see how that turns out. 

Work out 1 starts tomorrow.....